This is probably one of the hardest posts I have had to write.  But, I thought I should write it now while I can.

I writing a tribute to my first child, Cosmo.  Here are just a few photos of him and I have many.  Cosmo is still with us, but for how long we don’t know.  He started going down hill about a month ago.  I mean he has been having trouble with his back legs and arthritis for a while.  And this winter he had trouble getting stuck in the snow or falling down the stairs going outside.  But, this past month he has been getting worse and worse.  We took him to the vet because he stopped eating for a bit and he was in pain on his back.  At first we though it was his ribs, but no it is his back.  The vet actually thought he was totally fine as he was having a good day, made better by a solo trip in the car with just me.  But, his bloodwork came back and it wasn’t good.  He has a tumour.  We could spend thousands of dollars to give him a few extra months, but we decided to keep him here with us as long as he wasn’t suffering.

The last couple have days have not been good, so I know the time is near.  I thought while I had the chance, I would gather some photos and post them up because once he is gone, I won’t be much good for a few days, I know that for sure.

Cosmo came to live with us twelve years ago this May.  He was only ten weeks old and the cutest puppy I ever saw.  He was my little boy, my pal, my company back when Hubby used to work the night shift.    And even when Hubby switched to days and I would still be sleeping after a shift at the restaurant, Hubby would get out of bed and Cosmo would jump in and snuggle up.  Cosmo hasn’t been able to jump on the bed for a few years, especially since Mickey, would bump him off.

Back then, I had a convertible.  Cosmo would ride shot gun the two of us with our blonde hair (yes my hair was lighter before kids) flowing in the wind.  He came with me everywhere and he was the only dog my mother ever let into her house.  But, Mickey joined us and car rides were never the same.

Over the years Cosmo has kept me in shape, kept me company and nearly tripped me by lying at my feet. He has been with us through thick and thin always with his border-collie smile and lab instincts.  He knew when I was sad and he knew when I was happy.  He knew the right time to leave me alone and the right time to snuggle up.  When J was born he was protector of the protector (Mickey) and made sure that J was always safe away from paws and waggly tails.  Since Apple has arrived he has certainly felt like he went from the top of the rung to the bottom but, I am sure it has a lot to do with his health.

These last two photos are the cutest, I think.  The first one is of J in April of 2004, the second is Apple today.  That would make J and Apple the same age in this photo separated by four years.

This is going to be a rough time to go through, he will be missed by all of us.  We have been preparing J but, I know it will be hard for him.  And the worst part of it is that we don’t know how Mickey is going to be.  He has never been alone.  He has had Cosmo as his constant companion since he was four months old.  It may be a much rougher time than we originally thought as he knows that Cosmo is not well.

So, Cosmo this is not farewell, but Thank You.  You are loved and you will be missed.  By all of us.